A friend of mine told me he ran The Blah Blah through an internet test to see what grade level I wrote at. I came out somewhere in the Middle School years. His blog (here) was somewhere around the High School level. He acted smug about it, to which I responded, “You’re a big turd!” and ran home to watch cartoons.
I decided today to run the test myself, and here are the results:
|Average words per Sentence||8.47|
|Words with 1 Syllable||2099|
|Words with 2 Syllables||705|
|Words with 3 Syllables||238|
|Words with 4 or more Syllables||68|
|Percentage of word with three or more syllables||9.84%|
|Average Syllables per Word||1.45|
|Gunning Fog Index||7.33|
|Flesch Reading Ease||75.96|
Pretty cool, huh? Let me draw your attention to “Average Syllables per Word… 1.45” That’s like half my words are one syllable and half are two. How moronic can I be? I need to use more big words like “vacuous” and “artichokes.”
You’re probably wondering what the last three scores mean. Let me explain. First, the Gunning Fog Index. This measures how many years of schooling would be necessary for someone to understand my blog. It goes from 1 to 17, first grade to post-graduate level. My score of 7.33 means that someone three months into the 7th grade would be able to understand The Blah Blah. Turds.
According to Juicy Studio, where I took the test, TV guides get a 6 (so I’m better than that) and Reader’s Digest gets an 8. I’m more dumbed down than a Reader’s Digest, the literature made famous for it’s position of honor within the bathrooms across the nation.
Now, the Flesch Reading Ease (not Flesh Reading Ease, you pervs). This measures, on a scale of 1 to 100, how readable you are. Authors are urged to keep within the 60-70 mark. My 75.96 means I’m very readable. I’ll take that as a benignant thing.
Finally, the Flesch-Kincaid Grade is another rough measure of how many years of school would be necessary to understand the writing sample. It’s on a scale of 0 to 12, ending at your senior year in High School apparently. My score of 4.77 means most fourth graders would be able to understand me by the end of the school year. Which is weird, because I can’t understand them.
So there you have it. Contrary to popular belief, if you read The Blah Blah, it’s no indication that you’re any smarter than anybody else. But I still like to think you’re all better looking.
Do the test on your own blogs and let me know how you scored.